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Teresa's 2003 Journals

What would you attempt, if you knew you could not fail? Join Find out when I've updated the site! Sign My Guestbook Comments, Help, Advice Just drop me a line!! Please take the time to vote for my site so more people can get support on losing weight. THANKS!! January 1, 2003 Thought of the Day: If at first you don't succeed, Then try and try again! ************************* I cannot believe that a new year is all ready up on us. It seems like the older I get the quicker the years start to pass. I have decided to start my weight Journey a new. I am ashamed to admit that I have put back on most all of my weight. As of today my weight on my personal scale is 321 pounds. I do not know how in the world I ever put back on all that weight that I worked so hard to lose but when I look into the mirror I am faced to acknowledge the fact that I have. I am not happy about it and I can feel the effects of the extra weight every day when I wake up until I go to bed. I feel unhealthy and out of shape. I do not like myself and I do not want to live the rest of my life in this body. So today I start a new journey to get back what I have lost. I will begin my journey to lose this weight and to learn the skills and habits that it will take to keep it off for the rest of my life. Losing the extra weight is only 1/2 of the battle. Keeping it off is the other. I have to combine these things together to get me to the goals that I have set for my life. I hope you will join me on my journey to find the new me! This is One Person's Journey to Weight Loss January 3, 2003 Thought of the Day: "God, grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change; The courage to change the one I can; And the wisdom to know that person is me." ************************* We just celebrated Christmas on Jan 1 with my entire family who drove down for the holidays. I ended up getting a huge crock pot from my hubby, a paper shredder from my parents, Wine glasses from one of my sisters and my favorite gift of all , Tenderheart, Care Bear from my boys! We had a wonderful late Christmas!! We are also having our Christmas dinner this Saturday at my parent’s home and our once a month Breakfast with our friends on Sunday! So I should be up a few pounds before I even start on my new program!! I hate the way I feel now and I am determined to do something about this weight. Right now I am fighting a cold but I am still determined that Monday.. sick or not I am going to do something. I went clothes shopping today to pick up a couple of shirts since I have gained so much weight back. I had to purchase a 26/28. And they fit! Boo Hoo!! I can’t wait to get back into my size 20’s! I am planning to follow the Weight Watchers old exchange program. I have used it before and it works! When I get a bit smaller I will start to incorporate my weight lifting back into my program. I think for now I will start my walking with Leslie tapes on Monday. January 5, 2003 Thought of the Day: "It takes more to plow a field than merely turning it over in your mind." author unknown – ************************* I have spent most of the day home trying to fight this stupid cold. I feel a bit better but I still feel terrible!! We ended up skipping breakfast this morning with our friends and I ended up sleeping in. I haven’t gotten much done today around the house except for a few loads of laundry and eating an entire bag of chocolate. But I am getting in gear for my new journey that I will be starting tomorrow. I will go to my TOPS weigh in tomorrow to get my “official” starting weight. I know it is going to be high, I just hope that I don’t pass out or break the scale!! Well I am off to bed. I hope you all had a great weekend!! January 12, 2003 Thought of the Day: You can't make footprints in the sands of time by sitting on your butt. And who wants to leave buttprints in the sands of time?" ~Bob Moawad ************************* Hey guys, I am still struggling to get 100% back on program but I have taken several baby steps this week and I believe that I have had a loss. I will find out when I go to my TOPS meeting tomorrow!! I will be sure to post to let you guys know. I finally decided today on what to spend my Christmas money on. I purchased a postal/food scale!! Woo Hoo!! I am going to start measuring my food choices to make sure that I am not over eating on things like cereal, milk and other items. I am also trying really hard to get in my three servings of fruit a day. My downfall is chocolate!! OH MY!! We still have some left from Christmas and it has been calling my name! I know it is because I am not as determined as I should be. And that is because of the lack of preparing. I need to get in a habit! One side of me says to just stop eating and starve until the weight is all gone. (Never can do because I like food!) The other side of me says to just be happy being FAT! But that isn't going to happen either!! Because I HATE being fat!! So I guess I will go with the person in the middle who says to never quit trying!! January 16, 2003 Thought of the Day: "I hated every minute of the training, but I said, "Don't quit, Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion." ~Muhammad Ali ************************* Boy this week has flown by!! I am sorry I haven’t posted sooner!! I did go to TOPS on Monday and I am happy to say that I had a loss of 8.75 pounds!! Woo Hoo!! Now to stay on the ball and to keep losing this weight. This week I also signed up for The Great American Transformation by Bill Phillips. I have pledged to lose 25 pounds by March 31. If you would like to sign up you can do so by visiting this link. www.greatamericantransformation.com I also purchased today Bill Phillips new Body for Life Success Journal. I am really excited to read it and see what inspirations it contains. I am hoping to get back on the Body for Life plan after I get back under 300 pounds. I started exercising today!! I actually made it out of the house and went for a walk around our new park. I walked for about 1 mile. And this evening with the hubby we did our new pilates tape. I didn’t make it quite all the way through it but it was a start. As for food I am still struggling but doing my best!! I am determined to lose another two pounds this week! I wanted to pass along some info from my friend Lori. She let me know that the new episodes of the Body Challenge will be on today!! I am so excited that they decided to make a Body Challenge two! If you would like to know more about this show you can find more info at the discovery channel website. The show starts on Jan. 16 @ 8pm EST. The Body Challenge 2 January 27, 2003 Thought of the Day: There is a giant asleep within every man. When the giant awakes,miracles happen. Frederick Faust ************************* Well sorry I didn’t update last week!! To bring up to speed at my last weight in on Monday, Jan 20 I had a weight loss of 3 ¾ pounds!! I was totally thrilled to be doing so well but this week I really slacked off!! I didn’t take my vitamins and I didn’t exercise.... and the results are a 5 pound gain for this week. Oh well at least I have proven my theory that exercise and supplements are a very important part of losing weight. I am still going to have a loss for this month but I wanted so much more. Be sure to watch the Today show this week. They have a special on overweight children this week. February 18, 2003 Thought of the Day: ************************* I wanted to send a quick update to let yall know that I did have a loss on Monday at my TOPS meeting. I was down 2.75 pounds!! Woo Hoo!! My main goal is to have a loss every month!! So far so good!! I was down for January… Now to just make it through the rest of this month. I am struggling with updating my journal? I don't know why I just don't seem to want to do it. I might just email updates for a bit instead of putting them on my webpage. I hope everyone is succeeding in his or her journey to a new you!! May 4, 2003 The end of the road… And a New beginning!! I thought I would add this to my May journal. This is an email that I sent a friend of mine when I finally had reached the end of my rope!! I am just sticking my head in the sand and I don't know how long I will be leaving it there!! I can't tell you how bad I feel about myself and I don't want to make others feel bad with me. I am totally depressed and I EAT when I am depressed. And what am I depressed about.. But my weight and how bad I feel because of it!! I can't find any clothes to purchase that fit. I am down to only 3 shirts and I have my Sister-in-laws College graduation to go to next weekend and my husband wants me to go to his high school reunion the end of July! I feel like such a failure!! I was down 5 pounds for the month of April but I hit my "time of the month" on the 1st of this month and my weight was up way up! I am sure it was temporary weight gain but it was so upsetting. I went ahead and posted my new HIGHER number in the data base!! It can't go much higher right?? Well I need help with clothing.. does anyone know of any place on line I can order nice big FAT clothes?? I need a size 30-32 or 4X, other wise I will have to sew and I am not very good at it. Well I guess my last option is to go naked :) Thanks gang, Sorry for the boo hooing!!! May 6, 2003 Another start! I am determined to keep restarting on my journey to weight loss until I succeed!! I weighed in this morning and I am at my all time high!! I weighed in at 335 pounds and I am ashamed to admit that I was even up to 337 pounds this past weekend!! BUT…. I have decided to forgive and forget. So as far as I am concerned, TODAY is the very first day of my new journey. I am tired of feeling the regret and shame of gaining back all the weight that I had previously worked so hard to lose!! So please note that after this entry I will no longer refer to the past just the future. I have also decided that supplements are going to play an important part in my new lifestyle!! I will be taking Advocare Nutritional Supplements, A Perfect You to help me on my weight loss journey. I have taken them before and they seem to make a huge difference….but I stopped taking them because I could not afford them. But last week I sat down and looked at how much I hated myself and how miserable I was with this bloated tummy and flabby arms and legs and I decided that I had to put myself first!! So I ordered 4 weeks of my Advocare supplements in advance. I am determined to succeed!! Again my goal is not to be a Skinny Minnie!! But it is to be healthy at whatever weight I am at. I know I can do it!! I hope those of you who have stuck around enjoy my new journey and will join me!! I can’t promise to update my journal every day but I will try. May 8, 2003 I am so happy!! I have managed to stick to my program for 3 days now!! I can all ready see the numbers on the scale doing down!! What motivation!! I can’t wait till I am under 300 pounds!! That is my first major goal! And I know that I can do it!! Just one step at a time.. right!! LOL (Laughing Out Loud) I have been eating right every day. I still haven’t started exercising but I am sure that that is in my very near future!! May 16, 2003 I am so happy!! The scale finally budged!! I am down to 322!! Woo Hoo!!! I was beginning to think that I would be stuck forever!! That darn scale stayed the same weight for 7 days.... then today I dropped 4 pounds. What a wonderful feeling!! I can’t wait to get more of this weight off. I am determined that before our vacation to Vegas (in July) that I am below 300 pounds!! Today I was so motivated by the new numbers on the scales that I made sure that I went walking. I walked 35 minutes in my neighborhood. I hope to increase that time to one hour in the very near future. I didn’t walk very fast but I was determined to walk! I have made some changes over the past couple days in order to try and jumpstart my weight loss again. I am trying the Atkins diet. I don’t know if this is something I will stick with for very long but I must say that I am enjoying the new foods that I get to eat! I just hope I keep dropping the weight. I hope you are all succeeding on your own journeys to get healthy!! June 6, 2003 It has been a while since I have reported in so I thought I would get a caught up for this month. I had a set back on Sunday. We went out for our normal first of the month trip to Golden Corral (where we meet all of our friends once a month) I was really excited about going to eat at Golden Corral since I am on the Atkins plan because of all the great protein choices. But when I started to eat it was like YUCK! This is the same thing I have been eating all week!! LOL So I didn't enjoy it as much as I thought I would. I made the mistake of eating Crab Salad. I knew that it probably had some carbs in it but I didn't think that it would really make a difference. WRONG!! Turns out that artificial crab is full of carbs so I ended up knocking my self out of ketosis. (At this point my weight had crept back up to 317 pounds) I have been checking my ketosis level every day to make sure I have been sticking to the program and to me being "in the pink" has been very motivating!! So on Wed. when my little stick stayed white I was super upset!! I had to go and pick up some ice and stuff at Sams so I went ahead and had a pizza and a coke with the boys. I figured that if I was all ready out of ketosis what would it hurt!! :) I got back on program the very next meal. So when I stepped on that scale on Thursday I was not sure what my weight would do. But it was down to 315 and I can't tell you how happy I was!! Woo Hoo!! I am back on my high protein diet and I am really trying to be careful of those hidden carbs in foods. My goal for this month is to lose another 10-15 pounds!! I know I can do it!! If you would like to learn more about Low Carbs then visit these sites: Atkins Homepage Low Carb Friends Ketosis MORE on Low Carb I will also still be sending out an update of when ever I update my journal. If you would like to join this list (no chatter just updates from me) go to One Persons Journey to Weight Loss Updates I hope you are all succeeding on your own journeys to get healthy!! June 12, 2003 I have so many things to report in on that I don't even know where to start!! LOL I will start with us purchasing my son Connery a vehicle yesterday!! He is now the very proud owner of a 1987 (same year he was born!! hehehe) Bronco II, We only paid $3500 for it and it is in really great condition. He is so excited and proud!! It has a new paint job and looks so sharp!! The only bad news is that our car insurance will be going up $200 a MONTH for him to have insurance!! OUCH!! Not too sure how I will swing that one yet!! LOL But he promises to help pay it each month with his money from his Summer job. Last week my hubby and I kind of had a 3-day splurge and went off of our diets longer then we planned. I ended up putting back on 5 pounds!! OUCH!! Well I am happy to report that as of today I have relost those 5 pounds plus another two pounds and I am down to a new low of 313 pounds!! Woo Hoo!! I can't even tell you how good it feels to see that scale finally budge again!! I have also decided that for me that splurge was NOT worth it!! I really want to lose more weight this month!! I also have not been attending my TOPS meetings each week, as I should because Monday nights are super bad for us with family night over at my parents and my son’s Boy Scouts! We have another chapter here in Lubbock but they are a very small group! But I know that the support from my TOPS pals really make a difference so I am planning to visit the new chapter tomorrow morning at 8:30. The only excuse that I have to miss on Friday morning is being lazy!! And I won’t do that!! I am so excited and my current chapter is behind me!! They will still love me even if I do change over to a new one!! Can’t beat that!! I love TOPS!! You can learn more about tops and even find a TOPS chapter near you at : TOPS June 23, 2003 I don’t know why I find it so hard to do an update now days. It just seems that life has gotten to busy lately. I am doing still pretty good on my program. I am still following the Atkins program but I find that I am cheating at least once a week but at this point it hasn’t hurt me a bit!! Thank goodness!! I had a loss of 4.5 pounds last week at my TOPS meeting!! I was thrilled since I was only expecting a pound or two!! Hehehe I hope that scale was correct. LOL Everything is going really good for me. I am feeling so much healthier and thinner as each day passes. I love this hungry feeling!! I even find that I have to force myself to eat at times because I just don’t crave anything any more. Or perhaps it is just that I am TIRED of eating meat!! On the days that I do slip I have been eating fruit, veggies and I did have pizza last Friday. But it is ok. I find that instead of cramming all of that food in that I take my time to truly enjoy the food and the company. I find that I am eating much slower and trying to eat my salad first. You know what is truly amazing is when you find that 2 pieces of pizza is enough for a meal. I don’t have to eat the ENTIRE pizza by myself!! OH how proud I am of the small changes!! I hope everyone else is having a great month and making progress. If not remember it is never to late to restart. August 6, 2003 As you can tell, I managed to take the month of July off. I have been so busy with having my children home for the summer that I have done little else. We also managed to take a wonderful vacation last month to Las Vegas!! It was so darn HOT!! I am not looking forward to going back any time soon!! LOL Well not until it cools down a bit anyways. I am so tired of the heat!! I pretty much stay in the house all day long and do nothing!! After Vegas I some how managed to get my weight back up to a whopping 320 pounds. And now I am stuck!! I haven’t been able to get the scale to budge! But of course if you take into consideration that I am so totally unmotivated that could be my problem!! I am unable to will myself to even start any type of program to lose weight. I am just tired of sacrificing eating what ever I want. Pretty sad! I have thought numerous times to just give up and to close down my journal but I don’t have the heart to do it. If you don’t see very many updates for a bit you will know the reason why. I am waiting for a ton of bricks to fall on my head to jump-start me again!! At this point any weight below 300 would make me happy!! My goal is not to be thin but just to be healthy!! Sept. 5, 2003 Hello everyone, I am up and about and thought I better give an update of all that is going on in my life :) Not much!! LOL Well not really. The kids are all back in school and are excited!! They love band! My boys each play a different instrument. Connery plays the trumpet, Robert the trombone and my Joshua plays the french horn. So that leaves me a Stay at Home Alone Mommy :) As for the weight loss it has been a very slow struggle for me. I have lost weight for the past 4 weeks at each of my TOPS weigh-ins. It hasn't been much but still I am very happy. My new weight is 317. So I believe that would be a 3 pound loss from last month. I am still determined to get under that 300 mark and I am doing my best to make sure that I have a loss each week. I am not following any type of special diet at this moment. But I am calling it the "Poor Man's Diet" LOL We are on a very strict budget so we are eating a lot of pasta, rice and beans. I am watching how much I eat and I have cut out all snacks. Although I do have a pre-planned deserts on some nights. So far it is working. As for the budget, we have decided to pay off all of our debt by using Dave Ramsey's "Financial Peace". We are very excited!! We are even planning to pay off our home early if possible!! We do not have a lot of Credit card debt but my husband has a massive student loan that we feel is impossible to pay off at this moment. We are hoping that this will provide us with the knowledge and motivation to get it done!! If you are interested then check out Dave's website. He also has a daily radio show, which will motivate anyone to get out of debt!! Dave Ramsey Show Sept. 13, 2003 I am having what I call a “fat day”!! Do you ever wake up and just feel like a huge balloon!! I hate this feeling!! I don’t know why I feel this way!! It seems that on days that I am having a “thin day” that I do better with my eating and exercise! I know that I am still struggling!! Perhaps that is the problem!! It seems that I have been struggling way to long and I am starting to get sick and tired of it!! I am tired of struggling with money, weight and my health. I have got to get my “ducks in order” so to speak! Any ideas or tips?? I am to the point where I am totally desperate!! I watched the special last night with Dr. Phil but I wasn’t really all that impressed. I don’t know if it was just a crummy place to film the interview or what?? Here is a link if you want to check it out. Dr. Phil’s Plan for Weight Loss And Dr. Phil Weighs In On Obesity Well its going to be a short update but I am wanting to get back in the swing of updating my journal more often. I am not there yet, but I'm closer than I was yesterday!" Anonymous Oct. 15, 2003 This year is just flying by way too fast. I am still stuck in the same old rut. I am not losing but I am not gaining. But the weight I am maintaining is killing me!! It is way to heavy for my frame and my knees seem to hurt all the time. I have been given over the past month two books dealing with learning how to love myself. I am trying my best to get them read but they just don’t seem to “call my name” the way my favorite foods do. I am still following the “poor man’s diet” which is working very well with my budgeted amount for food but not very well with my diet. I am trying to add more fresh fruits and veggies into my diet. But it just seems much easier to eat cake and puddings. NOT GOOD!! But with each day I am gaining more hope on losing this weight and getting healthier. Every day is still a struggle but it seems to be getting easier. I am thinking about joining a gym called Curves. I have a friend in my TOPS chapter who has lost 100 pounds by following a low-carb eating plan and by exercising with Curves and she is so happy!! She just glows!! I know that if she can do I can do it.. But it seems that I haven’t found that driving force that will get me over this hump yet. I hope you are all doing well on your own weight loss struggles. I know for me that this will be a battle that I will fight for my entire life. Journal Archives [ Home | My Journals | My Story | My Pictures ] [Measurements & Weights | Tools to Lose | My Hobbies ] [Links & Webrings | Guestbook ] God Bless the USA